BBC news reports that Italy has just foiled a plan to supply thousands of weapons to Iraqi insurgents. A routine drugs investigation unearthed a veritable weapons ring that moved weapons from Libya to Iraq (presumably through Malta).
J'accuse reports that the although White House was caught unawares by the news, preliminary investigations by Bush's Rapid Intelligence Unit (R.I.D.I.C.U.L.O.U.S) found that Malta is an island Republic in the middle of the Mediterranean. The search had taken slightly more time than usual since the relevant information had confusingly been filed under the heading "Mintoff".
When asked to comment, President Bush remarked that the US was still unsure whether to add Malta to the Axis of Evil - particularly because of its strategic importance in the production of beer. "The people of the island seem to be particularly friendly having recently practically donated a huge chunk of their territory for the construction of a new embassy." - added America's number 1 [omissis].
J'accuse can also the reveal that the Maltese government will shortly announce strict collaboration with its American friends and make sure that any criminals will be brought to justice - preferably on CIA planes - directly to America or Rumania.
Finally, J'accuse can also reveal that the BBC, CNN, NBC and others are closing in on a scoop that will reveal that most Iraqi insurgents were originally trained by US militia during the Iraq-Iran war and that most Iraqi weapons also originated from the US of A.
With friends like these....
* Picture: Maltese supremo Lawrence "Slick" Gonzi seen here posing with Austin "Powers" Gatt... the next faces of the Axis of Evil??
** Nota Bene: None of the information given above is verifiable. All sources are questionable. As we say in Maltese "Ma min rajtek xebbahtek".
[ASIDE] What's all this rubbish in the international news trying to portray Malta as an arms shifting country? Do we really need proof that we would know nothing about this kind of deal? I mean can you imagine if GHKNK (federation of hunters) got wind of this deal? Now how many of you would really bet that the AK 47s would really end up in Iraqi hands and not in those of some triggerhappy cacciatore? Give us a break will you?