I.M. Jack

The Pharaoh Hound as best seen - i.e. alive and well, breathing and running playfully. Unfortunately centuries of breeding managed to create a breed that is resistant to sandfly but not to beating with an iron bar followed by hanging. J'Accuse condemns any acts of violence on animals and all reference to dog bashing in this post are intended to be sarcastic (just in case you do not get the point).

Yep. It's Friday not Saturday. But seeing that I promised myself to try to limit blogging on weekends the I.M. Jack section had to find its place somewhere else... and why not Friday ... a good day as any for a pillorying round up of the weekly news.

I. Short, Frank and Salt
Lanzarote's recent analysis of the analysts concluded on the short supply of quality columnists in the Maltese MSM. Mr Frank Salt was mentioned as being one of the frequently pilloried victims of J'accuse's cabbage throwing enterprises. And there is a reason for that (yes, I do like to start sentences with And *wink to Kenneth*). I know of no other columnist who manages to conjure up a contribution to the Times that smacks like an "essay" written for your religious doctrine homework. Here's an extract for your consumption (materialistic of course), the rest speaks for itself:

Our Catholic religion is not very strict; it just asks us to be good, behave properly, practise the teachings of Christ, and be present at Mass on a Sunday and on holy days of obligation if we possibly can. Our religion teaches us nothing else but good things, and ways to lead a peaceful life and, at the same time, give help to others.

Another Friday perpetrator of opinionist crimes is the Wise Old Man Alfred Mifsud. I particularly loved this weeks conclusion - as Dickensian as it gets... following a protracted reasoning that the implies that the church should somehow change its stand on divorce (!!!) he ends with a blessing for the incumbent Archbishop: "May God bless you and be with you Archbishop Cremona." Touching.

II. Gozo has gone to the Dogs
I have this gut feeling that DCG does not like Gozitans. Her latest descriptions of goings-on in the Island include the title "island of strange occurrences". True, the Munxar local council's activities and the dog killers' actions are not something to be proud of. But why is it that when something atrocious, appalling or illegal happens in Gozo it is the fault of the weird nature of the Gozitans, of the Gozitan omertà and of their unwillingness to submit to the law. If the same things happen in Malta (and they do) it is not because they are Maltese but some other trumped up reason (such as rural) comes up. I would not expect such generalisations from DCG but it would really seem that when it comes to Gozo it's not just a chip that she has on her shoulder... but a whole friture shack of the Belgian kind.

And (again) it would seem that it is not only DCG who thinks that Gozo is up for special treatment. Look at Harry today:

Is that why the Gozitan kerb tradition is completely on its own unique trajectory? Is it because bureaucreats in Malta have always dismissed Gozo? Are chaotic pavements a public assertion of clan and family claims or a monument to
administrative neglect spanning the centuries?

Ah that Gozitan clan. I can't wait to get back to Gozo and don my tartan "Ta' Zerrek" kilt, wear my sheep's wool body warmer and go hang a few dogs off the edge of too high a pavement. I never really liked the bastards anyway... skinny looking scavengers who used to scarew the bejeezus out of me when I used to ride my bike around Marsalforn (stopping to piss against every other corner to assert my territorial supremacy of course). Time for a gbejna break.... then I'm off to Munxar for a baseball match on the new concrete diamond pitch we will be constructing on the hills this afternoon (MEPA permission pending). The Munxar Crew will be facing the Sannat Posse and I'm sure there will be a huge turnout.

III. Archbishop's First in Valletta
For the factoid freaks among you make sure you take note that this is the first time in our country's history that the new Archbishop will be ordained in Città Umilissima instead of in the Città Nobile. Pawlu from the Duminku side has opted to break with a centuries old tradition and shifted all the celebrations and pomp to the City of Notte Bianca and Notte Magica. It's time for the Pomeriggio Religioso.... be there or be a divorce loving, embryo threatening, materialistic, wishy washy liberal.

IV. The Contributing Factor
Yesterday's Times editorial was pleasantly surprising. It's unqualified call to better control funding of political parties can only be applauded from these quarters. We are not alone in seeing this as a reasonable step away from the MLPN dominance that is only a myth in some quarters.

V. Edge
Xifer is on its slow but sure way back to the blogosphere. We spotted the quiet return thanks to our Bloglines list which detected some new uploading happening in that corner. Mark is not yet fully out of hibernation but he will surely be a welcome re-addition to this end of the blogosphere. We are still waiting for Maqluba to wake up though!

VI. You can be 1/100.000
The Official J'accuse Competition to commemorate the 100,000th click has started slowly, very slowly. No one has written in yet... which is just not cricket. I did promise a J'Accuse mug to boot (carrying a slogan "It was either cushion the entire planet or just your brain"). So here are the rules again. Contribution must have a maximum of 100 words in any of the following languages: Maltese, English, Italian, French and Spanish. They must sum up what the writer thinks about J'Accuse whether positive or negative. They can either be posted in any comment on the blog or sent to jacques dot zammit at gmail dot com. Competition closes with the 100,000th hit on J'Accuse.

God Bless Us All (and Archbishop Cremona)